TV’s Matthew Newton has recieved criticism for pulling out as many excuses as he does punches. But Newton has declared that he has moved on from those dark days of domestic violence. To prove he’s left it all behind he has penned this special report for AKTIFMAG where he tells us just ‘What I want to Bash Next’:
Hi Guys I’m Matthew Newton, Tortured artist.
Lets cut to the chase. So what do I want to bash next? First of all it’s an easy one. It’s these two miserable cunts.
Fancy giving me the green light to do as I pleased and then suddenly changing tune when dad had a gig coming up? Next up I really want to strangle this. The best bit would be the ability to easily hide in the bushes before I teach it a lesson.
This thing would be sleeping forever if I have my way.
Then it’s this little twat, I’d pull her hair and if she had a mobile phone I’d send her thousands of unsolicited texts telling her I’ll do it again.
And I wouldn’t mind smashing this bell end’s face into the ground of a hotel either. Imagine trying to get on TV without knowing anyone and relying on hardwork and dedication?
When I look at these two I see Bert and Patti. With it is a voice saying ‘kick them off a cliff, then blame someone or something else’.
Ok, It’s pretty clear this bitch needs to go and when I’ve finished with her my PR team will then give her a battering. Soon her own family will hate her as much as I do.
I’d love to be able to explain how much satisfaction it would give me to snap her like a twig but I’d rather save my energy for stomping on this little fucking prick.
But do you know what really shits me more than that miserable lot? It’s this, oh how I would love to threaten it by saying it would never get a gig in a BBC doco ever again while my family run this town:
The other thing that shits me is dickheads who say I only pick on things weaker than me. This is the biggest load of crap I have ever heard since Mummy told our TV station that News Corp hacked her phone. ‘Pick on a bloke your own size!’ commoners apparently yell. This really depresses me which results in me having to take it out on you know who. Well just to prove that I am not scared, here’s someone I’d love to nail next:
He looks like a real idiot to me, just laying there, all the same size as me and that. And what are those shoes? Anyway Fuck off I’ve had enough of this shit.
Thanks Matthew.
Matthew appears as a guest of Channel Nine to promote his family sitcom starring TV’s Bert Newton titled ‘One rule for us’.
I hope he has learnt his lesson
that little ape deserves to be stomped on
Good luck Mathew in rehab you will come out better man
I like your acting Mathew I dont see what all the fuss is about – Back in the old days the pubs closed at 6 pm so the workers had to scull quickly then stager home to give there spouse a brutal beating because the chop was over cooked – Sometimes if we were lucky there was a fatality in the street some one’s mum got a fatal beating Like Mortal Kombat before it was invented – Dont let this Nanny state get in the way of your good work
I reckon Matthew Newton V Kyle Sandilands would be an awesome celebrity deathmatch.
I would love to see a death Match – they both have heads 20 times bigger than any human on the planet – Biaferants I think they call them – I want Matt to win because he has actualy punched a few heads where as kyle hides behind body guards and is basicaly a big fat sook – Kyle threatins little girls – Matt gets out there and gets the job done
Matt will get another girlfreind – no problem – they want the attention – even if there head looks like a bashed over ripe water mellon
I agree with Spike!
I have noticed Matt has been working out – On Taxi Drivers heads
I have to agree with Matt – these Indian students who magicaly become taxi drivers in there spare time and drive us around town with no fucking idea where there going – they have a real prejuduce against me being Aussie – and take me for a stooge – the long way around to get more cash on the meter – you cunt – I hope it takes longer for the fire truck to extinguish the flames on your turban that I probably lit
I sound an extreme Liberal but actualy I am a labour fan I love AKTIFMAG and I am taking the piss obviously
take care merry xmass
I am actualy an extreme Liberal I love Captain Snooze and his broken nosed ugly side kick – no one knows his name he is such a cunt – I always comment in the herald sun but because I am a liberal young farmer and when I comment I always make a simple spelling mistake that makes me look like a total tool – I mean well and I want my point noticed but when I twell<< my point of view its worthless – it is not fair/fare
While I am still here – this other biaferant boof head cunt is back in the news Derryn Hinch – he is going to name and shame peodophiles – and is in support of organ donations – obviously – The Human Headline he is famous for – How about Mat Newton kicks his fucking liver in – that should silence the cunt for ever
Before I leave I seen this other fucked head the size of a water mellon driving a convertable in Richmond I think mercedes I am not sure-it was that cock drainer Neil Mitchel he was stoped at the lights I was looking for a jagered rock to throw at his head the lights turned green and he got away cunt
Neil Mitchel really needs a brutal beating to bring him back to reality I remember a few months ago he was having a sook about something I cant remember he was dying of something and having a sook about it but the cunt is still here – so that didnt work – On the radio he is a real smug cunt if he doesnt like your real view he will hang up in your ear and laugh – then his mates get on and they all debate about how stupid the caller was who disagreed with them – its the way they work they are gutless cunts I am just hoping Matt is pumped up enough to punch Neil Mitchels head into another galaxy
Alan Jones – dont get me started on this cunt
Cheers Spike……Bang on the money there!
Thanks Editor for your response
I respect you for allowing me to expose these so called shock Jocks for what they really are – a pack of cunts – But sorry I went off track with the story on Mathew Newton
You will always be welcome to vent your spleen here Spike.
BTW Jeff kennet was on the news tonight he wants to name and shame Drink Drivers – I think thats in retaliation to his own head looking like an over grown pumkin – Dont take out your agression on us Jeff your not in power now – Even the Hawthorn football team hates your guts – Go sit in the waiting room with Neil Mitchell and wait for your head kicking via Matt Newtons fatal round house facial kick
Before I go I have to tell you about this fucking turd
Robert Doyle This cunt thinks he owns Melbourne
today tonight get there trafic reports and information from taxi drivers such as Robert Doyal an ex taxi Driver so what ever he says must be Gospil – until a week later when they are shown on Media watch to be lying fucking fraudsters
get in the waiting room with your mates Jeff Kennet and Neil Mitchel
He is short is real life too.
Let me tell you about this Betch
Kate Langbroek I love Hughsey but he cant get a word in when little miss cant be wrong starts up – she is a fucking turd I just want to jump into the radio and nail gun her face to a 4 be 2
Tell us what you really think spike!
I will tell you what I think about the poofta bike rider and shane Warne – I hate poofta bike riders -Give the Poofta a metre so he can pedal his poofta bike and the poor old car driver avoids him and then turns out he is on a head on collision course with another car coming the other way
Get off the fucking road or pay a fee you cunts
Even though I think he is a twat I hope he wins this case
I will tell you what I think I hate poofta bike riders
in there poofta velcro suits Look at me I am a poofta bike rider they love the attention – they think they are grouse – there is a debate at this point in time because Shane Warne nailed one of the poofs and the bike rider is having a bit of a sook – boo hoo – get off the road you turd or pay a fee – We have to give the rider a metre free space as we pass them – But now giving him a metre we are now on a head on collision course with a semi trailor coming the other way – good thinking Fucktwats
The only Poof Bike riders I give way to is Drunks who have lost there license and it is there only means of transport to get to the bottlo
I can tell who is a drunk poofta bike rider going to Dan Murphys – They are always in black and ride a 1972 Dragster with colourfull streamers protruding from the handle bars
i dont think I just bullshit what ever comes to mind
I am doing a bit of bullying myself right here on this post but against people I see as bullies and I hope a few others will agree that all my comments are against said Bullies
Rock on
Spot on again Spike!
There is a big Fucking sook on youtube
He had a bit of a cry a bit of a Sulk – Because I told him to get fucked – Now this sook is a known Dickhead and now he is sulking about it
His Name is Andrew Bolt – AWWW BOOHOO ANDREW
The Beauty is he doesnt know who I am So I just tell him to get fucked 24/7
When I lost Both hands in NAM it really is hard to have feelings I cant feel any thing – thats why I am such a hearless prick
If you get up early Like I have to 5 am to slaughter animals for your Mcdonalds breakfast I cant believe the shit on tv – The Magic Bra goes for like 6 hours on how to make your shit tits look good then we have channel seven and nine come to life with them dickheads sitting around a couch laughing at there in jokes and they show a few youtube videos that every one has seen any way – back in the good days we had the Thunderbirds to watch now we have these cockheads
there is no escape the cockheads are on the radio to – there is no Fucking Music you have a gang of inbreed cunts on each station calling them selves the breaky show and they talk shit and give $100 prize just to test that some one is listning and of course they are they have no other option – Put some Music on you CUNTS
[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CvUxdQ4q-Lg[/youtube]
Who the FUCK is this Jolly little cunt Alan Joyce what a fucking turd this cunt is and on the Hearld Scum about 80% stick up for him – Obviously fish n chip owners who arnt allowed to beat there staff and pay 40 cents an hour and having a good sook about it even though they live in a mansion and drive the latest BMW to there shit n fish shop any way back to this Jolly Alan – hang on what is that other cunts name that fucked up Telstra and got millions and fucked off – Hired by Little Johny – he reminds me of that turd – watch him fuck Quantas up and run off trying to get a job overseas to milk more millions out of retards like John Howard – Dont worry Johny is not stupid there would of been some slimey kickback to hire a cunt like that for his bum kissing party
But according to the herald SCum commenters – we should be happy to take a pay cut and work for fucking peanuts – as long as there ok I guess with there profits and shares rising – you wont have a job spike you and your unions – serves you right asking for a 4 cent pay rise and we are going to ship your job overseas – Oh really well I am going to kick your teeth through the back of your neck and because there is no one here to treat your injuries because you sacked every one you will just have to wait – you fat cunt
The beauty off the social network is I have a voice and so do millions of others who can see through the bullshit and these ceo’s are going down – Unless there a good CEO some are actually good and put profits back into the company and share the wealth to employes and every one is happy
The poofta bike rider is back in my brain … this cunt poofta bike rider was cut off in church street Richmond by a little old lady driver who I could see didnt see this smart arse as he thought he had the right of way so peddled fast to get in front of little old lady – it is a 40 k zone so you have to watch out for pooftas – the cunt got nailed it was the funiest thing I have ever witnessed – the super hero started yelling at the old lady driver about road rules half his teeth were missing and there was blood n shit dribling out his mouth – They are fit people riding the bikes and I see it all the time they chase cars and then yell at the drivers if they break any rules the poor old car driver cant get away its a 40 k zone and it is usally bumper to bumper so the pooftas own the road – any way back to my story – tough boy poofta was yelling and squeling at the car driver then he relized was just a little old lady so he relized he looked a total tool – it was at the crossroads of Church and Swan Street and there were lots of people waiting for a tram that viewed this comedy – she reversed her car over his bike making it twisted and fucked – She escaped through a red light all the people waiting for a tram had a smile on there face the injured poof tried to give chase but his bike was a mangled wreck – I dont think I have laughed this hard since my Aunty got her head cought in an electric fence
So who is going to win Kev or Julia or Tony
I personaly want Paul Keating to arise from the past and start kicking heads it would make my day if he got back as PM
Imagine Paul Keating vs Tony abbot
Paul
you Fucking slimy little goose
Tony
NO to boat people no
no
Paul
you Fucking inbred budgie smuggling hypocryte – you have small man syndrome you maggot
Tony
NO to Carbon tax
Paul
you dead set fucking tool scum maggot
Tony
NO
Paul
cunt
Speaker of the house
you cunts
Rudd trying to get Numbers for his couse
Rudd
Hi Swany long time no see how is it going man?
Swan
Fuck off idiot … Click
Some turd in the Herald scum always makes the same comment He says the liberals have to get into to power to fix the mess that labour always leave
My Opinion is very differant
Labour has to get into power to fix the mother fucking tightarse cunt self centred greedy fucking pay workers nothing run the economy to suit your mates at the top that fat fucking pig squeeling Mining owner I cant remember her name all I remember is she is fat and fucking ugly and greedy – They shut schools down and shut every thing down and then say look at us arnt we clever that Maggot Costello Look at me I have saved some money arnt I clever – I hope the Nurses who fucking deserve a pay rise for there hard work spit in these tight arse share holding cock suckers drinking water I would cum shit and piss in it if I had the chance and force it down there throat with a fucking plunger
this wont happen but i would laugh if Keven got back into power and stoped the carbon tax – The whingers on the herald scum would have nothing to whinge about – Oh Sorry I forgot Andrew Fucking Bolt would be up on his high horse – I knew I was right he would squeel there doing a back flip they cant be trusted and then he would go back to boat people and then Kev would stop the boats – The Herald scum would be dumbfounded
Oh what about the broad band they would now squeel – Kev will say no we are cutting that out to we are going to downgrade and save a fortune and give you dial up speed just what you asked for because your to tight arsed and stupid to know any better
CockSucker From Toorak
“What about the indian taxi drivers”
Kev
“We are going to line them up and shoot them just as you wanted”
Turd From CBD
“What about work choices”
Kev
“We are going to allow whipping and instant sacking of under aged workers just what you asked for”
Peodofile from Park Orchids
“may I relieve my building orgasm with a splash of bukake”
Kev
“Yeah do what ever you like”
Tightarse from South Melbourne
” what about buskers in the city”
Kev
“We are going to round them up and shoot them”
Racist from Bulleen
“What about Asians and black people”
Kev
“We are going to fence off with razor wire broadmedows and chuck them all in there”
Child Stalker From Hoppers Crossing
“there cant be Gay marriage its against the Bible acording to Luke”
Kev
“your on the money there sunshine we are going to line them up and whip the fuck out of them public”
DickBrains from Collingwood
“I dont feel safe on public transport”
Kev
“Dont worry we are going to close it down No Public transport just what you wanted”
Andrew Bolt Herald Sun
“i dont aproove of all your changes you have given me nothing to sook about it is an outrage for free speech”
Kev
“Fuck Off idiot”
That girl on the Circle Yumi and George Negus got a hammering from the commenters about our war hero having a small cock and no brain on the herald sun – there was also an article on the same day in the same paper about bullying online – they answered that with heart felt admiration for the victom – then went and attacked George and Yumi like a brutal death hunt “Bogens”
These arm chair critics who think they are anon
are not now thanks to the new Google privacy policy
HAHA they are going to hunt you down – I am safe I use Yahoo
After Matty Newton’s latest ‘excursion’ yesterday, I googled ‘Matt Newton is a wanker’ and found this site – hey thanks for the laugh, well done and I got a good chuckle out of the comments – great stuff