Here was a lovely little article from The Age giving us the rundown on just who the cool people are and how they get invited to the most important events in modern civilisation- socialite parties.

At first the article served as a valuable tool for increasing my knowledge on the subject of how the children of ‘PR Supremos’ spend their time before I needed to use it to wipe, but then I wondered just how could us commoners also get into these parties? It seemed we could take a few tips from this look according to the author:

Being simple commoners we are certainly not ‘good looking’ and the only ‘creative’ thing we’ve done is draw a big cock on the wall of a milk bar in Mooroolbark so we’re up shit creek there. Thankfully we get some personal insight:

Sure this might be the case but it also helps that you look like that chick from Total Recall, you know the one with the head that gets ripped off and Arnie is under her. You know, that one:

Perhaps, the young man in the back corner who accidently sucked a lemon at the wrong time  could help?

So don’t go if it’s going to be a chore….then why the serious face? Take your own advice and put a smile on that dial!

Probably his best advice though was no good for us:

See, this is no good because A- Commoners parents don’t work in PR and B- if my mum was going to be invited to a party it’s going to be called ‘Christmas Lunch’ and the only hip thing around there is the talk of one of the relatives getting theirs replaced.

There were a few other gems in the article but after further analysis I realised that no matter what a simple commoner does, we’ll never be able to be truely be accepted in the hip parade. Thankfully the gentleman uncomfortable with fame in the front corner with quite an impressive ‘occupation slash ocupation slash’ resume seems to think it’s not all it’s cracked up to be :

Finally, he had some telling advice to put us all at ease:

Some cynical types might argue that appearing in a PR piece about being part of the hip parade and how to work the social circuit would be taking yourself seriously. Not me though, I’d just like to say thanks for easing the common folk down off the emotional roller coaster that was ‘The Hip Parade’.