Tonight: Cheap drinks and underage abused sex slaves.
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While in North Queensland I got the local entertainment guide to decide what sort of night time activities I’d like to indulge in. After deciding on ‘Ladies night’ I came across the advertisement above [Click on it for a better view]. When looking at the double page spread two things struck me: 1: The ridiculous shot of the blond, which [...]

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Striking back at terror: Bombing a nauseating ad campaign
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Instead of using bombs, today’s terrorists spread their ideologies through shitgrin ad campaigns. It’s all ‘an experience that will change your life’, make the world ‘an awesome place’, join in, upload this, smile about that and iPhone everything. We are at their mercy as they try and do a North Korea by converting us into becoming frighteningly happy faced – [...]

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Unimpressed Ali : Review of the Chechen Government’s Instagram Accounts
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By AKTIFMAG’s Senior Caucasus Correspondent – Artem Ludic. This year the controversial yet charismatic leader of Chechnya - Ramzan Kadyrov – got all of his Government ministers to join the selfie snapping circle jerk on Instagram. This mirrored the modernisation of the previously troubled country, with the recent stability and prosperity it’s enjoying being enough to put a smile on the dial of the [...]

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Celebrity Splash: Where are they now?
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When innovative broadcaster Channel 7 announced the highly-creative Celebrity Splash it was met with some minor scepticism as to what legitimate celebrities would get on-board. However, the people who still watched free to air TV were genuinely surprised when a who’s who of the corporate speaking circuit made themselves instantly available. But, a minority of nasty elements in the media [...]

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YouPorn Comments Used as Romantic Quotes
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You’ve probably seen them and even if you say you haven’t you’re more than likely to be too embarrassed to admit you have. Yes, it’s the depraved, disturbing and downright disgusting romantic quote cards that flood the internet and sicken the soul to the core. But what if we swapped their cheesy half-baked lines with actual comments by the passionate people [...]

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Wacky Waddlers: 10 Penguin Facts Things.
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Standard softcore penguin shot. They are the unpaid stars of movies, one of the few major tourist attractions in Victoria that don’t involve piss-stained alleyways and they provide subject matter for shit jokes in Christmas crackers, yet how much do you really know about penguins? Well, if you know moderately bugger all then it’s time you read ‘10 Penguin Facts [...]

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Do you need to summon the Aussie Fighting Spirits?
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Does your media story require a false sense of superiority, a little Aussie battler or a slow montage featuring Beaconsfield miners?  Then you need The Aussie Fighting Spirit.   Simply let AKTIFMAG’s psychics and mediums raise them for you. Whether you’re ‘reporting’ on natural disasters, financial hardship or just general heartache that everyone around the world experiences we’ll provide the [...]

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Owls about that: 10 Owl Facts Things.
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    An easily impressed owl yesterday. When the default animal of the internet was being chosen many feel the owl was a little unlucky in losing out to the kitty cat. Instead, in an ironic twist, the owl was lumped with a position on brooches and pins of cat ladies. Owls have also been forced to live a life of [...]

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Top 20 of 2012: Famous Thinkers Quoting Herald Sun Readers
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Last year we paired up famous thinkers with actual quotes, comments and letters from the readers of the Melbourne newspaper the ‘Herald Sun’ in our ‘Famous Thinkers Quoting Herald Sun Readers’ series. Now, it’s back with our 2012 collection of this year’s favourite innovative thoughts that have excited the intellectuals from our twitter feed @heraldsunreader         We even made the [...]

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11 Ads That Frighten The Shit Of You
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A popular author who was also a very wise man gave me some great advice when I was a youngster- ‘Write down and collect everything because you’ll use it one day’. So, after twenty plus years I present part of the fruit of my lifelong endeavours – a personal glimpse into a collection of ads that in various ways have [...]

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Who Is The Smuggest Looking Karnt?
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The smuggest looking karnts night of nights is almost here. Hosted by that pompous looking karnt, it’s sure to be a night you’ll never forget. Be thrilled as our top boffins debate just who is the best at smarmy quips and coming at you with their superior belief in their personal opinion and outlook. Kieron Perkins adds “It’s going to [...]

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Trying to get the Australian Mint to produce a Fiddy cent coin
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The other day a friend ‘liked’ a Facebook post that caught my attention. It was a by ‘Kevin Rudd’ on 50 Cent’s wall. The post had gathered quite a few ‘likes’ as you can see below: The reason it interested me was because back in 2006 myself and a bloke called Chook had tried to get 50 Cent commemorative coins [...]

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Down down, they’re going down.
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It seems everyone in one way or another has been pushed around by this little red wanker. So, maybe to be a little more truthful they should alter their ads:   But ironically, he’s not doing it single handedly and it’s about time we stopped him and his worthless pal poking us, and instead, we gave them the middle finger. And [...]

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Who Is The Best Cyber Bullying Celeb?
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Aussie Celebs from A-Z have been flooding twitter to show everyone just how much they hate The Shire. Armed with the official twitter hashtags #theshire and #theshiretv, nobody has been able to escape their musings as they spontaneously dish up their polished quips. So we’ve invited you, the members of the public and commoners, to put them in the hot [...]

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What type of Asian is this? Part two
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A while back AKTIFMAG started the ‘What type’ quiz series. Needless to say your answers for ‘What type of Asian is this?’ were shithouse. But it was tough, as were the others and now it’s time to test yourself again clever clogs and see if you can do any better in a new ‘What type of Asian is this?’ -Click [...]

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Our favourite things that Patti Newton has used to promote herself
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The Newton family’s ability to provide content for AKTIFMAG over the years has been unparalleled. But shooting Newtons in a barrel is not big or clever anymore and it’s time to actually come up with some original ideas. So to celebrate, we’ve produced a look back at our favourite things that Patti has used to get her noggin in the [...]

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The tragic tale of the rise and fall of a Socceroo
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This is the story of Phil’s dream, a dream that turned to absolute shite. It’s finally time to wipe away the tears and tell us all about it Phil: One beautiful day I received an email from the Football Federation of Australia [FFA] telling me that I had been selected to play for the Socceroos in a World Cup Qualifier [...]

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